It's not fair. I went to college to get away from that cycle, so I could be someone cool and new and yet still me. But I'm just stuck in the same fucking circle that I went through in high school, with PYT, with everything. Why is this so hard?

I shouldn't have made this decision. I should have picked somewhere else. Who cares that this is the best school I got into. I felt at the time that this wasn't right, wasn't 100% right. I forced myself to pick here. But I didn't want it. I should have chosen differently. I just wish I could go back in time. It's not fair. It's not fair.